I lost my sister at a young age. Don’t do drugs!

I lost my sister at a young age.

Don’t do drugs!

It was a rainy sunday morning, September 4th 2005, when I got the call. It was my mom saying that Elizabeth, my sister, had people over the night before and the house was a mess. She begged Mike and I to come over and help her straighten up.

We got to my mom’s house and went inside, as I walked into the kitchen I saw a marijuana pipe. I thought my sister was clean. They just let her off of mandatory drug testing because it was such an “inconvenience” to my mom. I didn’t agree!

Let’s jump back a few years.

I was in Tennessee for my 3-month visit with my step-nephew. I was about 20 or 21 years old. My mom called to tell me that my sister had not come home from work that night. They had called all the local hospitals and gave a description and identifying info and they said that she was not there. They called the local police and were given no information. I had a friend whose sister in law was a local police officer. I contacted her to see if she can find any information. She sure did.

 My sister was arrested.

She was in jail. And she was facing some bad charges. She, as a registered pharmacy technician, was addicted to painkillers. She apparently called in a prescription to a local pharmacy for a narcotic. In her husband’s name. With the DEA # of my orthopedic at the time. (She took me to my last appointment and got ahold of his DEA number at the office). The pharmacy thought it to be an odd situation and called the doctor’s office to confirm that my brother-in-law was a patient. When the doctors staff advised the pharmacy that my brother-in-law was in fact NOT A PATIENT they decided to call the police.

How it went down.

When my sister went through the pharmacy drive thru to pick up the prescription the local police officers surrounded and then arrested her. Her charges were: obtaining a controlled substance by fraud and having a large amount of a controlled substance in her possession with supposed intent to sell!. She was facing 25 years to life.

Bad withdrawals

While in jail she had to be admitted into the infirmary because she was so addicted to these pills that she’s been taking for so long. Her body couldn’t handle the withdrawals and she was having multiple, up to 100+, seizures a day. This amount of back-to-back seizures caused her to become permanently brain-damaged.

Court Date

When it came time for my sister to put in her plea, the judge, attorneys and doctors labeled her incompetent to plead her case. They are pushing her case back until if/when she becomes competent. Back to jail she goes. She had a few more court dates after that and eventually the judge decided to release my sister in my mom’s care under Pretrial release.

Pre-Trial Release Terms

Her pre-trial release terms were to have outpatient addiction therapy and mandatory drug testing when her Pre-Trial officer called and told her to come in, or they would come to the house unexpectedly to administer the drug test. When the doctors and her pretrial officer determine she was competent she will be able to plead her case.

No-More Drug Testing

At her last court date in early July 2005, the judge and pretrial release officers decided to stop the mandatory drug testing as it was becoming an inconvenience to my mom and other parties. Since she was so “brain-damaged” they didn’t think she was even competent enough to get drugs much less use them. She did still have to continue with the outpatient therapy. I seriously think this was the worst decision anyone has made since the day my sister decided to become an addict.

*Later in that week my sister was picked up by the police for walking down the street half-naked. The officers took her to the local hospital for psychiatric help. When she was admitted into the hospital they ended up drug testing her and found cocaine in her system. I did not find this part out until way after the fact.

The Most Horrible Day

Back to September 4th 2005, that rainy Sunday morning. When I found the marijuana pipe at my mom’s house I just about went ballistic I was furious, I couldn’t believe after everything that happened she would use drugs again. I had to get out of there. My husband and I went to the corner store to calm down a little. I needed time to think.
Eventually we headed back to my mom’s house. She was outside with a very concerned look on her face.  Immediately she tells me to go make sure my sister was breathing. She was in her room sleeping and my mom tried waking her up when, she didn’t respond that’s when my mom got worried.

I go into my sister’s room and she is sleeping, or so I thought. I start screaming at her to wake up. She doesn’t respond. I get closer and louder, still nothing. I grab her by her hair and pick up her head and OMG she is dead. She’s gone. Forever.

I call 911 and tell them that I was pretty sure my sister was dead and to send the paramedics. Not even 5 minutes later they were there. They kicked us out of her room. My mom, my husband, and I were waiting at the end of the hallway waiting to find out. A paramedic comes out a while later and confirms that she is in fact dead.

Investigation

While the officers were searching my sister’s room, they found cocaine, a half empty bottle of xanax (that was actually prescribed to my sister which was a stupid thing for a doctor to give her that), and a guy’s license. Who is this guy? And why is his license in her room? The officers ask us and not my mom, my husband, or I have ever seen him.

CRIME SCENE

Since there was this unknown guys license the police decided to turn the house into a crime scene. Making sure that there wasn’t any foul play! They kicked us out of the house. For 5 hours we were waiting outside in the rain! It was not pouring but it was steady falling. I had to call everyone, to let them all know what is going on. And one after one, they started showing up. Waiting outside in the rain with us.

Rainbows

As the medical examiner arrives to take my sister away a large vibrant RAINBOW appeared in the sky. It was beautiful, I have never seen a rainbow so vibrant before. It almost looked as if it was a painting! As they close the double doors and drive away with my sister the rainbow follows with them and disappears from the sky.

Medical Examiner

Since they still didn’t know the absolute cause of death they did an autopsy. Her cause of death was a drug overdose. High levels of cocaine and xanax were in her system. They ruled it a suicide. Which I don’t agree, I think it was an accidental overdose. If it was a suicide I believe my sister would have taken all the xanax she had. But I am not the professional. At least in that field!

Organ Donation

Since my sisters had drugs in her system they wouldn’t let us donate any major organs. But we were able to donate her eyes.

Dear Liz,

I miss you, but I hate you. I hate you for falling victim to those awful things. I hate you for leaving me. I hate you for leaving me with her. As I was told my entire life, I was conceived as a playmate for you. You were my best friend. You were my sister. It was supposed to be me and you against the world. You left me. I can’t take on the world on my own. What you did was selfish and irresponsible. You were so smart. Book smart at least. But you did the most stupidest thing. Why? Didn’t you listen when you were told that drugs are bad. That drugs will kill you? After everything you have been through you still went back to them. And to think I looked up to you. You were my hero once upon a time. I wanted to be just like you. Smart and beautiful. You ruined my dream. You ruined a part of me. A part of me that I will never get back. You took it away. Forever. You took you!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Have you lost someone you love? Someone to drugs? How has it affected your life? Have you made peace with it. Talk to me

  • Vibeke J

    Wow , this is so touching. I am so sorry for your loss. It must be so hard and I cant imagine. I recently lost a good friend to cancer, she was only 27. It is so sad to lose people around you especially in such a young age. It is unfair. I am sure your sister is at peace and take care of you and are with you even though you dont feel or see it. I think doctors need to be better to help people without drugs and really help them mentally from within.

    I wish you and your family all the best.

    Hugs from Vibeke

    • My sister was 25. Yes doctors are pill pushers to the end. then want you born on meds and to die on meds. So sad. I wish they would learn to look deeper into situations and not just medicate the symptoms

  • Daria Vinning

    I’m really speechless! This is so heartfelt and close to home for me. I’m dealing with this in my life, with a close family member. It seems as if drugs have taken over. It’s really sad and heartbreaking. I’m seeing it so much in our young people and the hold it has on them is so strong. I’m so sorry for your loss. In my life, I’m scared of this exact thing happening. I just keeping praying and I pray for you as well! Thanks for sharing!

    • Daria I am sorry you are going through a similar situation. Its not fun and you are allowed to be dismantled for a while but maybe try reaching out to your family member maybe just have a nonchalant conversation about the color blue and when caught off guard throw in your concerns! I wish you and your loved once health and happiness!

  • Gina Ritchie

    What a touching story. I hope (and believe) that sharing stories like the can make a difference for people experiencing similar difficulties.

    • I hope so as well. Thats why more people need to be open and share

  • I’m so sorry you had to lose your sister to addiction. I currently have a little brother that is battling addiction, so I know exactly how you feel. It’s so hard to see a loved one slip away as the result of something like this. Thank you for sharing your (and your sister’s) story.

  • I’m so sorry for your loss – I can’t imagine how difficult it was for you. I don’t have any siblings but my husband has two brothers who continually dabble in drugs which can be very concerning since I know nothing good comes out of taking drugs. Thank you for sharing your story and getting it out into the world <3

  • So sorry for your loss. We lost a friend under almost identical circumstances. Jail, rehab, nothing helped. You did everything you could.

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